May 28, 2020 § Leave a comment
I am broken now.
I will wake a different person.
May 27, 2020 § Leave a comment
You slept with an eye open
And hands fisted,
On your brown belly.
When I think of you now I feel anger and fear-
There is no more pain or sadness
Which comes when hope blocks all reason.
I sleep under your balcony, not five metres
From the bed in which you broke me.
All my life is here now, in the whispers of this garden.
In the morning, the birds speak of the last doll
Every little girl remembers.
Such a shame we do not know it is the last doll,
Or we might have demanded grander, greater.
We don’t know we each are growing up to be
The last doll.
May 26, 2020 § Leave a comment
Is such a great thing
That when you are not looking
It disembodies you
Removes your immune system
Removes your self-protective casing.
In the morning you wake with a sense of unease.
In the night you wait for sleep with dread.
You have been here once before, five years ago.
You haven’t lived since.
This is the crossroads; live, die, or disappear.
The consciousness of your own existance rests too heavily on young shoulders.
Ask for help.
May 24, 2020 § Leave a comment
There is only love,
And living quietly with the consequences of impulsive decisions.
The love is resting now. It is exhausted, embattled, but not broken.
It waits hopefully for the morning.
A new day, a new month, Sivan.
Sivan surely is the month of a great love, the greatest-
In these days we must be at peace with ourselves.
We must look pain in the eye and say
‘I accept you Torah, because I am the survivor of generations.’
And the generations do not sit heavy on our shoulders.
In Sivan, they retreat silently,
They form a circle around us
And we are filled with light in dark times.
May 23, 2020 § Leave a comment
How hard it is to trap free people
To love them
To coexist with them as if they are
Your very own skin.
How hard it is to love you
As though you were the beat of my own heart
Tumbling in a maze of shadows, fears, loss.
How hard it is to lose the free person
Whom you love violently,
So freely, in a sense.
May 20, 2020 § Leave a comment
I saw love disfigure me
And in a quiet second free
My past, my present, the parts I
Had long cleansed from my memory.
For love is but a great return
To painful knowledge, clarity-
And those who cannot gain entry
To love, remain unburdened, free.
May 17, 2020 § Leave a comment
Summer hits you-
A fresh idea
Carried out in wet paint.
Not a leaf stirs.
The greenery is alive with the voices of ants
Plotting their travel.
All the world is
May 15, 2020 § Leave a comment
Had I gone back to the start
Back to the birth of my first words
Back to the first poem-
Had I not stamped out the fire,
Where would I be now?
Where would my heart, my weary heart be?
My duty is to myself, and yet,
I wanted to wrap myself up in you.
All dreams fade, painfully,
May 14, 2020 § Leave a comment
Surrounded by the ghosts of Jerusalem-
Are our enemies within the gates?
They surely are.
They pray for blood, they celebrate the arrival of the morning.
A boy without brothers is buried within us as day breaks.
There can never be peace, I tell myself.
The pain must be put aside, and we must go on, until another generation can untangle the knots in the wild, untamed curls of the promised land.