October 20, 2021 § Leave a comment

It’s time to speak about the war.

The war outside, the war inside of you.

You are a mirror, society is a mirror- we are only as many pages deep as the books assigned to us by cold curricula.

How can you live in a teapot, Alice, in an upside down world, with a tipsy topsy roof and raspberry windows?

How can you live inside the whisper of what was supposed to be, but could not?

Inside the story of your self-sabotage, dripping with doubt? The self-sabotage of the state of Israel is my self-sabotage.

We olim. Work. Silent. We write, privately. Rarely participate in public discourse

Inside the denial of your own dreams- and you have worked so hard to eat cheese before every bedtime. Shame.

A part of you is that sarcastic, wizard, little girl.

A part of you is an adult, scarred by war.

To the lighthouse, then?

No other English girls live on this street, in this neighborhood. You are the only Jew in the village, so to speak.

But you feel at home because the anger and resentment of losing one month of sleep as bombs rained without so much as an introductory note, one month spent squatting in the stairwell with your pale-faced neighbours- that earned you the right to call yourself at home here.

It’s strange, you had intended to write in the first person, about the moral consequences on the individual as a result of the collective refusal of a society to make peace.

But in a crisis, after a crisis-

I call it going to ground. I grab my pen. I write. I ground my everything.

October 20, 2021 § Leave a comment

‘The moon is so big and beautiful. It is here to stay.’

Words I heard you sing so long ago.

Cheshvan- Time Heals

October 19, 2021 § 2 Comments

Too late

I learned the half-life of love.

You, my love high, leave me after hours, but these conditions into which we bind moments…but no.

There is time.

Time is what I learned through you-

Love’s shelf-life.

For no thing is immortal, not even love.

Love is bound to time, and time expires.

I have made a solemn vow to love every living thing equally, even pain, which has taken on a life of its own within me recently.

On one thing we can be sure, time is beyond whatever we think we are in control of.

I resolve to love moments, for the half-life of the love you bring me backfires, and I crave more. So no more craving.

I’m present.

I’m growing.

May I bring joy and receive joy with gratitude.

This poem is dedicated to the memory of Guru Jagat. Hope to join you in my next life as a fish. Without you, I would have been a toad in this lifetime. BDE


October 15, 2021 § Leave a comment

A life of quiet contemplation

Well lived

Well grieved

Well healed.

The arrow nicks no low-lying branches.

Dead Men

October 15, 2021 § Leave a comment

Dead men do not an empire make.

Dead men lie in the shadows of war and

Piece by piece overshadow the peace of

Sons and daughters that might be, but will not be.

In this case,

Is it not better to build, build, build

Until there is no more land,

Until there are more mouths to feed than food,

Until the empire caves in upon itself?

Our empire, built by the living,

On the graves of our regrets, our guilts, our painful secrets, our abandoned pasts?

Which historical narrative are you currently using to cover up the truth about the present?

Have you asked yourself, recently?

The end of information

October 4, 2021 § Leave a comment

Simchat Torah?

September 26, 2021 § 2 Comments

I think god is a kind of knowledge we develop inside ourselves, a way of learning our place in the world and making peace with it.

What I cannot make peace with are the ghosts, ghosts of futures that never transpired. Ghosts of lives I did not live, ghosts- ghosts are regrets, griefs, despair.

We are the things that haunt us.


September 21, 2021 § Leave a comment

The most unimaginable of pains.

Nationalism, the great unifier of men.

I bleed the blood of one thousand men,

One thousands weeping mothers.

I wait for it to end, but the blood keeps coming.

A great war in the soul, my love.

New Beginnings

September 20, 2021 § Leave a comment

A dying man looked upon me.

All of a sudden I had a strong desire to leave this world and return as a bird.

I wanted to soar away, over the rooftops of Tel Aviv.

I wanted to sit in your window, and sing in the morning.

I wanted to investigate the disappearance of my dearest friend, the sun.

I wanted to fly to the Horn of Africa, and return with the hum of summer in my feathers.

On this note, I reject this lifetime.

How could my creator have neglected to give me wings, when I was clearly destined to fly?

If ever you see a bird consumed by the pleasure of flight, think of me, for there shall I be.

Yom Kippur 2021- endings

September 16, 2021 § Leave a comment

Think of me when you walk by a sweet jasmine plant, that lives in the starry thrill of the night, and shares its secret with everyone in the street.

Think of me when you smell its aroma filling your brain with pleasure.

Think of me when you fall in love on a swing tied to a great tree, and lie listening to the great treetrunk creaking above you.

Think of me when a wind rustles the leaves, rippling through the grass.

Know that I came from a green place, and unto it shall I return.